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~Tharryc:iconTharryc:

John Westover  
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dear goddear god,   
i thought you and i might have a discussion, because i know we don't always see eye to eye. i guess it's just that i have a few... i don't know, questions, grievances, whatever. So first thing I'm going to do tomorrow is print this and throw it in an envelope and drop it in the mailbox and maybe you'll write back and we can settle this.   
so my first question is this: why are you taunting me? I work so hard, you know? and i found that all the wrong kinds of things happened, and i became a person i wasn't happy with and so i stopped the work because i guess i saw stopping as a way to reverse the damage i had d dear god
in General Non-Fiction on 7/22/08
Exercise 3The past few days I've become consumed with this concept of how self-involved we tend to be. And I feel like I've become sort of.... self aware. Like my conciousness has expanded beyond itself. Does that make sense?   
 I may be going insane.   
 I just have this sort of open feeling, in my mind. I'm in this state where I'm watching myself do things with some amusement. Anger is a silly emotion, but I make sure I show it just as a reminder that I need to, for some primal reason. People are so unreasonable that it makes me laugh inside.   
 But with all this I've acquired this sadness, this isolatio Exercise 3
in Essays on 6/30/08
Exercise 2Dear you,   
 I have hobbies, though most wouldn’t realize it. My favorite hobby is social experiments. The most fascinating thing in the world to me is tweaking small social conditions in order to better understand the people around me. Guess I made a mistake doing that with someone I cared about.   
 See, here’s the silly thing. You make me nervous. For some reason, you’re the only person I really worry about spending time with. As a result, I always shower, always make sure I’m clean-shaven, and always make sure my car is clean before I spend time with you. I know I’ve hurt you before, Exercise 2
in Essays on 6/29/08
Exercise 1You know, it’s been a long time since I’ve done this.   
I’m a little scared. Nervous. What’s the right lighting? Music? Will you think I’m awkward, bad – a mistake? I guess what they say is true: practice makes perfect. And I’m plenty rusty.   
It’s been, what, probably at least three years since I last did this. Since I last let it go. It makes me sad. I brought it on myself though, I really did. I keep asking myself how exactly I lost my way, when. When did I become this person, this echo of something that wasn’t me to begin with?   
Can I be completely honest with Exercise 1
in General Non-Fiction on 6/15/08
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conversations with godBOOM   I’m running through the desert, shirtless, my soaked jeans clinging to my legs and my sandals plopping in the mud. Flash and I cringe at the fury of the storm over head.   Man, I think. God’s pissed.   BOOM  YES, I AM.   Flash.   Cringe. The wind blows harder and the already sharp rain drops hit me like needles. The points of spears. The blades of swords. Shrapnel from a grenade, a thousandwhipsfortheslavethebombincineratingmillionstankscrushingfamilysandlivesandswhirlinghumanityallinthisoneinstantthismindfuckthisonemomentofpainandhumanlife.   And then it stops, my vision conversations with god
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Journal Entry: Thu Jul 3, 2008, 2:25 AM
  • Listening to: Alone Apart- The Swell Season
  • Drinking: Green Tea
So I've come back to DA, at least a little. It's nice, and I missed it.

Unfortunately, I haven't written in so long that I've begun to feel as if I'm forcing myself to write every time I feel even a bit like doing so. It's part my innate laziness, part a lack of writing any time recently, and part summer laziness.

But to feel like I'm forcing myself to write kind of defeats my purpose, I think. Each time I've done it, it's been a release, and I can feel a pressure lifted off my mind.

It'll take time, but I need to get back into it. For myself.

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Devious Information

  • Current Age: 19
  • Current Residence: Phoenix, AZ
  • Interests: Guitar, Writing, Computers, Comics, Life
  • Favourite band or musician: Dave Matthews Band
  • Operating System: OS X
  • MP3 player of choice: iPod

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~A-Shade-of-Grey:iconA-Shade-of-Grey: Mar 27, 2007, 12:36:12 PM
I'll keep my end of the bargain probably later tonight, dear.


Although, it wasn't really a bargain. It was a....promise? I don't know.
~Shikaz:iconShikaz: Mar 25, 2007, 4:44:44 PM
Dear Friend,
welcome to DA and please enjoy your stay
if you have any questions or help feel free to ask :)

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